hmm, my past two/three days?

well, on friday, i show up to work at 1:00 (like i was told to do), but the clinic closed early. so i just got my paycheck and put it into the bank. went to the mall and played a little ddr and para para.

saturday, i woke up at 5:30 to watch the soccer match between corea and turkey. it sucks that turkey scored the fastest goal in world cup history. =/ but i also got a snazzy shirt from my mom that is like all red devils go corea style. ^_^ um, played a lot of warcraft iii, played a little ddr, had some dinner with sis/dad, and watched harry potter.

brings you up to speed, no?

and this updated was brought to you by tara. because she's the one that told me i haven't updated in a while. so i'm here. roar. XD

well, my boss gave me a choice. either i go to work part time from 1 till whenever i finish my paperwork, i stay at 5.50 an hour. or, i can start working full time, 9 to 6 (with an hour lunch break), and get 6.75 an hour. i want the extra money, but working full time doesn't seem like the thing for me. . . i don't wanna be stuck just doing work this whole summer.

on another note, my mom set me up on a little blind lunch date yesterday. i decided, what the hell, it's not like i get the chance to go out with girls everyday, so i took her to lunch. IT WAS THE WORST EXPERIENCE EVER. ;_;

let's just leave it at that.

x laura palmer x (11:06:54 PM): i dont think your my staler
x laura palmer x (11:06:56 PM): stalker*
x laura palmer x (11:06:58 PM): your my friend
x laura palmer x (11:07:00 PM): :-)
KimCiCLe Prex DX (11:07:06 PM): woo~ ^_^

bleh. i cut work early today to play some para para dancing, but the manager of the tilt messed up the paperwork, so they don't have the tax stickers on the machine yet. they don't wanna set it up w/o the stickers, so it's gonna hafta wait till tomorrow or something.

oh, saw minority report on sunday. good movie, but the weird thing is that it reminded me a lot of run lola run.

bleh. i don't think i'll cut work again tomorrow, but i'll still check to see if it is up or not.

back to warcraft iii. ^_^

OMG.

our tilt got a para para dancing!! XD

it won't be set up till tomorrow, though. =/

maybe after a lot of practice i can be l33t like tara, who is the "best para player in austin." ^_^

woo~ more morning musume vids 4 me!!

Which member of Morning Musume are you?

here's my list:
#1 Aya Ishiguro
#2 Yuko Nakazawa
#3 Mari Yaguchi
#4 Hitomi Yoshizawa
#5 Maki Goto
#6 Sayaka Ichii
#7 Makoto Ogawa
#8 Nozomi Tsuji
#9 Asami Konno
#10 Ai Kago
#11 Natsumi Abe
#12 Rika Ishikawa
#13 Ai Takahashi
#14 Kei Yasuda
#15 Risa Niigaki
#16 Kaori Iida
#17 Asuka Fukuda

i know, i'm not a girl, but hey. i like morning musume. don't hold it against me. ^_^

AUGH.

i was trying to win a PS2 IIDX controller off of ebay and such, and i was winning with less than a minute to go.

i'm thinking "yes, i got it, but i should just make sure" and i refreshed the screen every so often.

the thing is, with 5 seconds left, someone outbids me. ;_;

damnit all. i really wanted that controller. . .

seems nothing is going my way today.

heh. decided to take the day off from work. i'm just burning myself out with so many freakin' hours, that i never have time for myself to do nothing.

so that's what i'm doing right now.

oh, happy birthday zack. enjoy some chipotle that you are always ravin' about. and learn more korean. ^_^

gas station hax! XD

OMG! KOREA WON!

:: runs around with red body paint on ::

so awesome. ^_^

what's even cooler is that a player on their team has the same first/middle name as me.
#19 ahn jung hwan

replace ahn with kim, and that's my korean name. ^_^

eh. i guess i'm just an idiot for jumping to conclusions.

please ignore my previous post. i would delete it, but it's a great song.

now, back to our regular programming.

the last song i will ever write about a girl by the ataris

broken heart again today...
the flowers that I gave to you have withered all away.
just when I opened up my heart
the one i used to love came and ripped it right apart.

why do I never seem to learn?
that love is wrong and girls are fucking evil.
i guess i'll never figure out
what womankind is all about.

i heard your voice again today
i'm scarred by all the lies that were once promises you'd made.
i lie in bed awake at night
and wonder what went wrong or even more just what went right.

why do I never seem to learn?
that love is wrong and girls are fucking evil.
i guess i'll never figure out
what womankind is all about.

i'm hooked on morning musume.

i just put together a desktop from multiple pictures of them.

i've watched the one vid i have of them (chu! natsu party) about 20 times now.

soo l33t.

"chu! chu! chu chu chu! samaa paati
chu! chu! katai shichau wa chu!"

the rest i can't figure out except for some english thrown in there

back to that vid until my next one finishes downloading. ^_^

OMGWTF lolz (9:20:40 PM): you are a rad dude ryan from el paso
OMGWTF lolz (9:20:46 PM): haha
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:20:52 PM): what makes you say that?
OMGWTF lolz (9:21:26 PM): you like the musume
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:21:40 PM): it is addicting.
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:21:41 PM): XD
OMGWTF lolz (9:21:42 PM): and have in the past listened to punk and ska
OMGWTF lolz (9:21:48 PM): so you are rad
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:21:57 PM): wow. coming from you spence, that means a lot. XD
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:22:02 PM): seriously

==

OMGWTF lolz (9:43:27 PM): the cs blows at ut austin
OMGWTF lolz (9:43:40 PM): it's like second in crappiness to EE
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:43:43 PM): lol~
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:43:50 PM): good thing i'm going to ut dallas then
OMGWTF lolz (9:44:00 PM): word
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:44:43 PM): and i can hax ddr w/ zack
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:44:44 PM): XD
OMGWTF lolz (9:45:33 PM): zack is into the finkl and momuso
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:47:16 PM): sweet
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:47:17 PM): XD
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:49:31 PM): mind if i cut/paste this convo into my blog?
OMGWTF lolz (9:50:14 PM): go for it
OMGWTF lolz (9:50:21 PM): make me look cool
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:50:25 PM): ok
KimCiCLe Prex DX (9:50:25 PM): XD

==

spence is one l33t guy. go to his blog.
he's letting me leech morning musume vids off of him. XD

speakin of which, THEY ROCK!

it was saturday night i was online with my friends
we were doing alright just me and myself
i was surfing around
didn't know what i was looking for
and then you came
you stole my heart
and then you went out the door

i've got a pain in my heart
and i blame it on you
a pain in my heart
it feels like i'm breaking in two
i've got a pain in my heart
and i blame it on you
a pain in my heart
i've got a crush on you

so i'm looking into your bedroom eyes
and i know i'm walking on thin ice
but i can't ignore, i can't ignore
i'm burning inside
yes since you came and stole my heart
i'm burning up inside

i've got a pain in my heart
and i blame it on you
a pain in my heart
it feels like i'm breaking in two
i've got a pain in my heart
and i blame it on you
a pain in my heart
i've got a crush on you

You are, to put it bluntly, a performance-oriented perfectionist. Everything in life, you take very seriously. You and Beethoven Virus would be great buddies...when you can find time together. You could benefit from a bit of relaxation.


Which Pump It Up Song Are You?


that was rushing through the quiz. after going back, and looking again, i got. .



Let's face it, you're a bit of a drama queen. You may not be quite the exhibitionist that Starian is, but you two share many traits. You're just a little more...conservative. You have a few things you're really good at, and they're probably in the fine arts, hey?


Which Pump It Up Song Are You?

i got my first paycheck friday. it turns out that i don't get 7.50 an hour like i thought i would, but 5.50. ;_; but money is money, and i have a job, so i shouldn't be complaining. anyways, $175.50 paycheck. but it's all gone. let's see how clumsy dex is with his money:

1) father's day gift. expensive watch. $95. ($80.50 left)
2) billabong shirt. $50 ($30.50 left)
3) gas/groceries. $18.50 ($12 left)

i'm down to $12 bucks. ;_; not good. . .

i gotta find a better way to manage my $$$, it would help if my mom would pay for the core stuff (like groceries). . .

*sigh* oh well. working more hours might help my problem. . .

well, rummaging through my stuff from my trip, i found the coolest thing: a poem that monica mckinney (aka tara's little sis) had rolled up on tables at her graduation lunch/brunch that i went to on sunday. liked it, and i'm here to share it with ya. XD

=====
the unicorn - a poem by shel silverstein

a long time ago, when the earth was green
there was more kinds of animals than you've ever seen
the'd run around free while the earth was being born
and the loveliest of all was the unicorn

there was green alligators and long-necked geese
some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born
the loveliest of all was the unicorn

the Lord seen some sinning and it gave Him pain
and He says, "stand back, i'm going to make it rain"
He says "hey noah, i'll tell you what to do
build me a floating zoo and take some of those

green alligators and long-necked geese
some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born
don't you forget my unicorns

old noah was there to answer the call
he finished up making the ark just as the rain started to fall
he marched the animals two by two
and he called out as they came through
"hey Lord,

i've got green alligators and long-necked geese
some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
some cats and rats and elephants, but Lord, i'm so forlorn
i just can't find no unicorns"

and noah looked out through the driving rain
them unicorns were hiding, playing silly games
kicking and splashing while the rain was falling
oh, them silly unicorns

there was green alligators and long-necked geese
some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
noah cried, "close the door because the rain is falling
and we just can't wait for no unicorns"

the ark started moving, it drifted with the tide
the unicorns looked up from the rocks and they cried
and the waters came down and sort of floated them away
that's why you'll never see unicorns to this very day

you'll see green alligators and long-necked geese
some humpty backed camels and some chimpanzees
some cats and rats and elephants, but sure are you are born
you'll never gonna see no unicorns.
=====

i wish the best of luck to you monica. may your future be properous. don't work too hard at the waffle house. and thanks for letting me celebrate this event with you. =D

man, i just couldn't sleep last night. i just tossed and turned and just couldn't seem to get it right.

why, do you ask?

i was just worrying about a whole bunch of stuff. my list of things to worry about ::

1) people i love. i've been hurt so many times by the ones i love (mainly my mom and my older sister), i'm scared that others will do the same.
2) my future. am i destined to make a difference? what about college? am i "just another brick in the wall?"
3) my job. i keep thinking that i'm screwing up somehow, and i'm gonna get fired really fast.

i read something very intresting yesterday at the clinic. it went along the lines that a male child usually suffers from self esteem issues and depression if the father figure of the family leaves at an early age. now i have a good idea of where that came from. . .

and why doesn't anybody leave any comments? =/

okies~ the moment you've all been waiting for. . . dex's badass trip to houston for hax'fest. XD buckle up, because it's gonna be a long ride. . .

friday
==================
i rush out to the airport to meet up with geno and his mom. we get on our flight to san antonio, get there for a layover, and our connecting flight to houston is 45 mins late. >_< by the time we get to houston, it's like 8:30. i step off the plane into the little gate thingie, and i start to choke because of the humidity. anyways, there's tara, leonard, and tim waiting. we all pile into tara's car and drive to the galleria to bust out some para para paradise, even though i only know boom boom fire. tara was showing off, and tim just made it look gay. XD we were gonna meet up with zach at stargate right after a "quick" eat at denny's. boy, were we wrong. the service was horrible, and our food kinda sat there for about 45 mins before it got to our table. it was all cold and icky and stuff. =/ so, after the gayness that was denny's, we decide to go back to tara's. tim and leonard show off their superior skills at keyboard mania and beatmania iidx, while i couldn't pass anything. proz showed up and we all went to sleep. me? i was on the floor. yea for wooden floors!

saturday
==================
woke up and took a shower. got all dressed ddr style (look at pic, jeans w/ long ornage shirt) and loaded up to hax up hax'fest. damn, stargate was hella small. it's a cool arcade with some of the best games, but still, small. soo many people were there, it was more humid inside than outside. met a lot of cool people. signed up for freestyle and perfect attack. for my freestyle, i just asked the crowd for a song, selected it, and put on shuffle so that it would be a true freestyle. still, dexter's moves were not l33t enough as i didn't even rank. oh well. time for perfect attack. with my "great" luck, i pulled up Sainochi for my first match. >_< got massacred. but it was double elim, so i thought i was ok. until i realized who i pulled for the second round. needless to say, i was out fast. kinda pissed at myself for not being prepared, but jennie was there to cheer me up. ^_^ so, i got to mingle and stuff. haxxed a gas station with the state-wide famous zack (mr. i can almost AA so deep and win hax'fest by 2 perfects). got beat a gazillion times by tara in magical drop three and puzzle fighter. saw the beginning to battle royale, but people wanted to play iidx rather than watch it. =/ i wanted to watch it. anyways, all said and done, we go back to tara's, where a few more guests drop by. dex sleeps on the floor, but atleast this time, the cat gets to walk all over his face.

sunday
==================
woke up and took a shower (again). got dressed up all nice style because tara's sister was having a little graduation party at her church. went there and met tara's sister, her mom, and her mom's boyfriend. had free lunch (yes for free lunch. . . well, it felt more like a brunch). then, we go back and pick up tim and leonard. we go to a gatti and play a little 4th mix plus. cool stuff. then tara drops off tim and leonard at the airport. afterwards, me and tara play a little PIU at the mall near her house, and we also get to visit the biggest wal-mart in the world. (*gasp*) it was really big. it took a while just for us to walk around it. after buying a few vanilla cokes and some snacks, we go back to tara's and watch run lola run and the cell. slept, but this time split the bed with tara b/c she's cool like that. XD

monday
==================
woke up kinda late and just layed in bed. got all packed up and stuff and head to airport. fly home. wait at airport for 2 hours for ride. and then i played some ddr max2 at the mall.

there you go. my ultra-fun trip in houston. there are so many stories i can tell about it, but this was just a condenced version. i'll get back to some of them later. but here are some previews:

"like a badass"
geno holding a watermellon
moonlight shadow

ok. i'm tired. like a badass. XD

one of the reasons why i went to houston for hax'fest. jennie's such a cutie~ XD

and walter is in the background lookin' like a badass.

and what does jennie have in her hands? that's right. LOLLICUP! XD

god damnit. i hate my life. i just fuckin' come home from houston and my family is already giving me crap.

i wanna hide away at tara's house. forget about everything. like i did this past weekend.

i try so fuckin' hard. why can't i do anything right?

tara...i so need you right now...

i need...somebody.

it's been awhile
since I could hold my head up high
and it's been awhile
since I first saw you
and it's been awhile
since I could stand on my own two feet again
and it's been awhile
since I could call you

and everything I can't remember
as fucked up as it all may seem
the consequences that I've rendered
i've stretched myself beyond my means

and it's been awhile
since I can say that I wasn't addicted
and it's been awhile
since I can say I love myself as well
and it's been awhile
since I've gone and fucked things up just like I always do
and it's been awhile
but all that shit seems to disappear when I'm with you

and everything I can't remember
as fucked up as it all may seem
the consequences that I've rendered
i've gone and fucked things up again

why must I feel this way?
just make this go away
just one more peaceful day!

and it's been awhile
since I could look at myself straight
and it's been awhile
since I said I'm sorry
and it's been awhile
since I've seen the way the candle lights your face
and it's been awhile
but I can still remember just the way you taste

and everything I can't remember
as fucked up as it all may seem to be I know it's me
i cannot blame this on my father
he did the best he could for me

and it's been awhile
since I could hold my head up high
and it's been awhile
since I said I'm sorry

if you see a movie this summer, make it run lola run.

best movie ever.

well, i started battle royale, but only saw like 10 mins of that. it looked cool from the parts i did see, except for all the violence and stuff.

the cell was cool also, but not as badass as run lola run.

ok. enough with pluggin' movies. i'll give a day-by-day analysis of my trip later.

well, i really sucked it up at ddr in houston. reasons why i sucked:

a) i suck
b) i have never played on a 5th mix
c) i suck
d) i played against some of texas' finest
e) i suck

anyways, atleast i had a blast. it was good to get away from the family and stuff. so, anyways, yeah. i'm takin' up tara's online time and the such. so, i must be off. maybe a video will be up by wednesday? hmm, whatever. back to keyboardmania & iidx. l33t stuff.

well, i'm going to be in houston for a ddr tournament until monday. i should be able to make some posts while i'm there (because tara's cool like that) and stuff. yea for play time for ryan! XD

too bad tara's not online right now. =(

houston, here i come. hax'fest better be prepared for me! :D

i guess it all started with a small game called dance dance revolution. after playing it the first time, i was instantly hooked. i kept playing, and soon, my addiction got me to search online for fellow players. push came to shove, and i soon found myself involved in a ddr team from houston. that way, i found myself talking to a certain person. well, this was like in, say, january of this year. ever since, everytime i get online, i hope to see her online. these past months, our relationship has grown to a place i really like to be. i just love the feeling.

as i've grown up, i have been convinced of the inadequacies of the written language when it comes to the description of feelings or emotions. however, there are times when you simply must write down something because there is no other convenient or practical way to do it. so, it is with a heavy heart that i am forced to express the feelings i have for this girl, because i know that these emotions are poorly served by the simple words i must use. it is not enough for me to say that i love her. i have used this same word to describe my relationship with ddr, my computer, and those little bagel things with the pizza inside that you microwave. so, to use it to describe the immense feeling and emotions that she elicits in me seems wrong. however, i have no other way to really explain it. so i will use it under the condition that anyone reading this knows that the word love is a mere shadow of the feelings i have for her. that no matter how beautiful it might be it is still only a shadow. the feeling itself, that which casts the shadow is more brilliant and colorful than you can possibly imagine. with that i supposed it is safe to continue.

tara mckinney, i love you.

maybe the best e-mails are the ones that don't say much at all

==
From: KiwiCookie@aol.com
To: kimcicle@elp.rr.com
Sent: Tuesday, June 04, 2002 7:19 AM
Subject: hi~


Just on my way to work..

and wanted to say hi.

And thats all.

Okay bye. XD

~Tara
==

i woke up to find this in my in-box. :D
now there is no way today can go wrong now. ^_^

i just though this was TOO funny:

this SO reminds me of me...